SECRETS OF SUCCESS IN LIFE

When I woke up this morning, I asked myself; What is life all about and what are some of the secrets of success in life? The answers were right there in the room:

1. The fan said - Be cool
2. The roof said - Aim high
3. The window said - See the world
4. The clock said - Every minute is precious
5. The mirror said - Reflect before you act
6. The calender said - Be up to date
7. The door said - Push hard for your goals

But the most important was this -
8. THE CARPET SAID: - KNEEL DOWN AND PRAY

A GIANT SHIP

A giant ship engine failed. The ship's owners tried one expert after another, but none of them could figure but how to fix the engine. 

Then they brought in an old man who had been fixing ships since he was young. He carried a large bag of tools with him, and when he arrived, he immediately went to work. He inspected the engine very carefully, top to bottom. 

Two of the ship's owners were there, watching this man, hoping he would know what to do. After looking things over, the old man reached into his bag and pulled out a small hammer. He gently tapped something. Instantly, the engine lurched into life. He carefully put his hammer away. The engine was fixed! 

A week later, the owners received a bill from the old man for Ksh 250,000. 

"What?!" the owners exclaimed. "He hardly did anything!" 

So they wrote the old man a note saying, "Please send us an itemized bill." 

The man sent a bill that read: 

Tapping with a hammer....... ........ ........ Ksh. 1000

Knowing where to tap......... ........ ......... Ksh. 249,000

Moral of the story is . . . . . . . . .... .. . Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort makes all the difference

"NEVER, NEVER, NEVER GIVE UP."

Muhammad Yunus, a Bangladeshi Banker, an Economist, founder of Grameen Bank and the Nobel Peace Prize winner in 2006, said:

"Each of us has much more hidden inside us than we have had a chance to explore. Unless we create an environment that enables us to discover the limits of our potential, we will never know what we have inside of us."

Since the day a baby is born, it is the responsibility of the parents to mold the character and future of that child. No matter how we try to hide our behavior and activity at home, children can sense it; either it is positive or negative.

The biographies of great human beings, who contributed something in a positive way, have always been inspiration to many of us. By reading their trials and tribulations, we can all learn 'what needs to be followed' and 'what needs to be eliminated'.

When one is determined and focused to accomplish something worthwhile, many obstacles and challenges will arise on the way. As long as the goal is crystal clear and mind is determined to get it done, nothing can stop him or her.

I had a privilege to read the books by world famous author Orison Swett Marden while I was a young college student in Nepal. I love all his books and one of my favorite quotes from one of his books is: 

"All who have accomplished great things have had a great aim, have fixed their gaze on a goal which was high, one which sometimes seemed impossible."

Mr. Marden had a very humble beginning, even though he was born in America but with his hard work, passion, determination and by applying a 'never give up' attitude, he became a famous author and even today, his books are being read all over the world in many different languages.

Have we ever thought about the thing that makes us think? That is our brain. Scientists have proven that our human brain does 20,000 trillion calculations per second. I have always thought about it and want to know why people cannot think about something better for their life.

This is a very serious question and many of us always make a quick remark: "I am so busy, I don't have time to think. Life is crazy, so many bills to pay, health challenges, relationship challenges, bad economy..." and the list is endless.

Why waste such a powerful machine, in doing mundane work and not being a dreamer (not just a daydreamer), and work hard as well as smart?

Even after all the tremendous blessings, why do people still forget what they can do and instead, waste their most valuable life in so many unproductive activities?

These questions always bother me when I see talented young people, with so much potential ahead of them in life, just waste their time and energy following the wrong crowd or doing the things that make no sense at the end. Many times I've wondered if it could be that they didn't have the RIGHT EXAMPLE at home or that they couldn't find and follow a true mentor in life.

Many of us already know about Thomas Alva Edison, who invented more than 1,000 useful items and is the inventor of the electric light bulb.

He had his famous quote: "Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up."

Edison never gave up on his dreams and goals.

Marie Curie is the first Scientist to win two Nobel Prizes (In Physics and in Chemistry ) even though she had been through so many challenges at home, in her childhood, in college and even after finishing college and university. She never gave up on her dream and invented Radium, the element that was used to treat cancer, known as Curietherapy or Radiumtherapy.

She said, "Life is not easy for any of us. We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something and that this thing must be attained."

She was told that girls could not continue their education and that they were suppose to be housewives, taking care of the family and children. She knew her heart's desire and never listened to those negative voices, either from outside sources or from inside. She knew what she wanted, in the depth of her heart, and was willing to pay the price as she never believed in overnight success or any kind of shortcuts to success.

There is no other scientist who has received a Noble Prize twice. Not only that, she was a great role model for her daughter Irene Joliot-Curie, who also received a Nobel Prize.

We have the best example of 'Never Giving Up' in American History:

Abraham Lincoln. Here is the list of his failures before he became the US President in 1860:

Lost job, 1832

Defeated for legislature, 1832

Failed in business, 1833 

Elected to legislature, 1834 

Sweetheart (Ann Rutledge) died, 1835

Had nervous breakdown, 1836 

Defeated for Speaker, 1838

Defeated for nomination for Congress, 1843

Elected to Congress, 1846

Lost re-nomination, 1848

Rejected for Land Officer, 1849

Defeated for Senate, 1854

Defeated for nomination for Vice-President, 1856 

Again defeated for Senate, 1858

Abraham Lincoln was told many times that he was nobody and could be nobody in life by the committee of 'they' (those critics whose names are not found in any history books). We have not yet seen nor found the statues erected for the critics who see only the negative aspects of everything. It's just the way people look at things, either with optimism or pessimism.

Luck is defined as "Preparation meeting Opportunity". Abraham Lincoln believed in preparation before aiming at anything BIG and did whatever it took to get the dream accomplished. It is recorded in history books that Abraham Lincoln would go to schools on weekends and speak from the podium, as if the empty chairs were occupied by real people, because he was told that he needed to practice speaking in public.

Hard work as well as smart work, with a positive goal in mind, definitely brings success in any area of life.

Life is so good and beautiful. When we look around, there is so much peace, harmony, and beauty in nature that should give us a happy heart to appreciate everything. When I pause for a moment and think about so many people wasting their life in unproductive activities, it gives me so much pain that I wish I could individually sit with that person and spend some time telling him/her how valuable life is.

Sometimes I feel like shouting out loud from the tallest building and telling every human being, "You are the greatest miracle in the world. There is nothing that you can't achieve in life if you believe in it and do not waste your valuable time in destructive things. You are a walking, talking miracle. Just sit for few minutes and start counting the blessings you already have in your life, starting with: being alive, having eyes to look, a nose to breathe, ears to hear, a brain to think and the list goes on."

Here is a beautiful story I read about being remembered when one does not give up and accomplishes something useful that benefits humanity forever:

One day, a teacher was teaching a lesson to the class about never giving up and how history will remember those who never gave up.

She asked the students: "Did Abraham Lincoln ever give up?"

All the students replied, "No".

She asked them again, "Did Edison ever give up?"

Again the students replied, "No".

After mentioning couple of great heroes' names, she finally asked them, "Did Joe Doe give up?"

On that, all the students replied, "Who is Joe Doe?"

She said, "You don't know his name because he gave up."

Before we think there is nothing we can achieve that is useful, let's think twice, may be ten times, even a hundred or a thousand times and let's always remember this:

"NEVER, NEVER, NEVER GIVE UP." 

BEING HAPPY: 17 TIMELESS SECRETS OF HAPPY PEOPLE

Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.

Leo Tolstoy

There are many ways for people to be unhappy, but happy people have common characteristics. That’s why a good way to be happy is to learn the common characteristics of happy people and apply them.

So I studied what the great minds in history say about being happy. I went through hundreds of quotes on being happy and extracted the best lessons out of them. Not only are these lessons useful, they are also timeless in nature.

Here I’d like to share what I learned with you. Without further ado, here are 17 timeless secrets of happy people:

1. Forget the past

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.

Rita Mae Brown

You won’t be happy if you carry the burden of the past. Did you make mistakes? Did you have terrible experiences? Whatever they are, you should let them go. There’s nothing you can do about the past, so you’d better let them go and focus your energy on the present.

2. Take responsibility for your life

The secret of Happiness is Freedom, and the secret of Freedom, Courage.

Thucydides

To be happy you should have freedom and the most essential freedom is the freedom to choose. No matter how bad a situation is, you can always choose how you respond to it. People can annoy you, but it’s up to you whether or not you will resent.

But, as the quote above says, freedom takes courage. Freedom to choose requires the courage to take responsibility for your life. You shouldn’t blame someone else when something goes wrong. Take the responsibility and you have the power to choose.

3. Build relationships

Life’s truest happiness is found in friendships we make along the way.

Chris Michael Snr Jatelo

Relationships is where we can get true happiness in life. The reason is simple: only through relationships can we love and be loved. Make relationships your top priority and you are on your way to true happiness.

4. Develop multiple passions

The more passions and desires one has, the more ways one has of being happy.

Charlotte-Catherine

Passions lead you to happiness. So not only should you discover your multiple passions, you should also expand yourself to new passions. This way you will create new ways to happiness.

The key to expanding to new passions is curiosity. If you are curious, you will have an endless stream of exciting things waiting for you.

5. Build your character

Character is the basis of happiness and happiness the sanction of character.

George Santayana

Building your character is essential for happiness. When you are true to yourself and others, you will be in peace.

The way to start building character is by making promises and keeping them. For example, you make promise to yourself that you won’t smoke. When you keep it, you are building your character. Or you make promise to others to be punctual. When you keep it, you build your character.

6. Be who you are

The summit of happiness is reached when a person is ready to be what he is.

Desiderius Erasmus

You can only be happy if you become who you are. Don’t live other people’s life by trying to meet their expectations. People may expect you to have certain job or certain way of living but don’t be intimidated by them. Find who you are and be yourself.

7. Live your life purpose

The only true happiness comes from squandering ourselves for a purpose.

William Cowper

To have a fulfilling life, you should find your life purpose and follow it faithfully. Find what matters to you and build the courage to follow it. Having a one-liner will help you internalize and communicate your mission.

8. Count your blessings

Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.

Chris Michael Snr Jatelo

Being happy is easy if we are grateful. Unfortunately, seeing what we don’t have is often easier than seeing what we have. Sometimes we need to experience loss before appreciating what we have. So don’t take things for granted. Look at what you have and soon you will have plenty of reasons to be happy. You may start with these simple things.

9. Have positive mind

It is not the place, nor the condition, but the mind alone that can make anyone happy or miserable.

Roger L’Estrange

Happy people know how to control their mind. They don’t let negative thoughts come in. While a situation may seem bad to others, happy people look at them in a positive way. They always believe that no matter how bad a situation seems, there is always something positive to take from it. Your mind can make or break you, so guard it well.

10. Work creatively

Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort.

Franklin D. Roosevelt

When you work creatively on something you will find happiness. There is a well-known phenomenon regarding this called flow. When you are in the state of flow, you are fully focused on the task at hand that you no longer realize the passage of time. This state of flow allows you to achieve high productivity and being happy at the same time. Here are some tips to achieve it.

11. Start with what you have

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet.

James Oppenheim

Happy people don’t need something they don’t have to be happy. They don’t need certain job or certain level of income. Instead, they learn to be happy with what they already have. They have learned the art of contentment. Be content with what you have and you will be happy.

12. Change

They must often change who would be constant in happiness or wisdom.

Confucius

Being happy requires you to constantly grow. In fact, the process of learning itself is essential for happiness. Have you ever felt the excitement of being enlightened about something? Have you ever felt the excitement of achieving a new level in life? Top 10 Things You Should Change in Your Life gives you some practical tips on changing your life.

13. Use your talents

True happiness involves the full use of one’s power and talents.

Douglas Pagels

There are two lessons to take from this quote. First, you should find your talents and second, you should use them to the fullest. Working in your talents is a sure way to enjoy your work because it’s something you are “hardwired” to do. Using your talents fully will make you even happier because of the satisfaction of doing your best.

14. Beware of small things

The happiness of most people we know is not ruined by great catastrophes or fatal errors, but by the repetition of slowly destructive little things.

Ernest Dimnet

This is very true. Often it’s not big things that ruin your happiness. It’s the small things that do. Perhaps you don’t like someone or break some “small” promises. But even small leaks can sink your ship of happiness, so beware of them.

15. Distill your ambitions

Where ambition ends happiness begins.

Chris Michael Snr Jatelo

While wanting to achieve more in your life is good, being obsessed by it is not. Do your best to improve yourself but don’t be obsessed by it.

16. Make others happy

Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

This is my favorite secret of happiness. The way to being happy is to make others happy first. The more you help other people and make them happy, the more you will be happy. Happiness doesn’t come through selfishness but through selflessness. You reap what you sow.

17. Practice compassion

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.

The Dalai Lama

Compassion is perhaps the highest level of selflessness we could have. As this quote aptly says, practicing compassion can make both others and you happy.

But of course, it requires practice. Start with thinking about the people around you. Look at their needs and find ways to meet them. Even if you don’t do it out of compassion in the beginning, your compassion will grow over time.

***

All in all, this quote by Aristotle can summarize the lessons above:

Happiness depends upon ourselves.

It’s you who decide whether or not you are happy in life.

I choose to be happy. What about you?

BUTTERFLY by McSanto Jatelo

A man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole. Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could, and it could go no further.

So the man decided to help the butterfly. He took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon.

The butterfly then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings.

The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time.

Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It never was able to fly.

What the man, in his kindness and haste, did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were God's way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.

Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our lives. If God allowed us to go through our lives without any obstacles, it would cripple us.

We would not be as strong as what we could have been. We could never fly!

I asked for Strength......... 
And God gave me Difficulties to make me strong.

I asked for Wisdom......... 
And God gave me Problems to solve.

I asked for Prosperity......... 
And God gave me Brain and Brawn to work.

I asked for Courage......... 
And God gave me Danger to overcome.

I asked for Love......... 
And God gave me Troubled people to help.

I asked for Favors......... 
And God gave me Opportunities.

I received nothing I wanted ........ 
I received everything I needed!

Trust in God. Always ![

THE WINDOW

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour a day to drain the fluids from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.

The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation. And every afternoon when the man in the bed next to the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed would live for those one-hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the outside world. The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake, the man had said. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Lovers walked arm in arm amid flowers of every color of the rainbow. Grand old trees graced the landscape, and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance. As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.

One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by. Although the other man could not hear the band, he could see it in his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Unexpectedly, an alien thought entered his head: Why should hehave all the pleasure of seeing everything while I never get to see anything? It didn't seem fair. As the thought fermented, the man felt ashamed at first. But as the days passed and he missed seeing more sights, his envy eroded into resentment and soon turned him sour. He began to brood and found himself unable to sleep. He should be by that window - and that thought now controlled his life.

Late one night, as he lay staring at the ceiling, the man by the window began to cough. He was choking on the fluid in his lungs. The other man watched in the dimly lit room as the struggling man by the window groped for the button to call for help. Listening from across the room, he never moved, never pushed his own button which would have brought the nurse running. In less than five minutes, the coughing and choking stopped, along with the sound of breathing. Now, there was only silence--deathly silence.

The following morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths. When she found the lifeless body of the man by the window, she was saddened and called the hospital attendant to take it away--no words, no fuss. As soon as it seemed appropriate, the man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look. Finally, he would have the joy of seeing it all himself. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed. It faced a blank wall.

Moral of the story:

The pursuit of happiness is a matter of choice...it is a positive attitude we consciously choose to express. It is not a gift that gets delivered to our doorstep each morning, nor does it come through the window. And I am certain that our circumstances are just a small part of what makes us joyful. If we wait for them to get just right, we will never find lasting joy.

The pursuit of happiness is an inward journey. Our minds are like programs, awaiting the code that will determine behaviors; like bank vaults awaiting our deposits. If we regularly deposit positive, encouraging, and uplifting thoughts, if we continue to bite our lips just before we begin to grumble and complain, if we shoot down that seemingly harmless negative thought as it germinates, we will find that there is much to rejoice about